Daily Blog #30: “The Juice” is Free… on Parole… in October…


Immediate reaction… WOW. I didn’t watch that 12 hour long docu-series thing ESPN made that everyone sucked their dick over, because fuck thats long and ESPN sucks, but even I know is a huge deal. Don’t even start to come at me over all this shit saying I don’t know shit cause I didn’t watch that. Anyone with a brain who knows sports knows the O.J. situation. It’s like one of those things you’re born knowing if you know sports.

As much as I hate to admit it, O.J. looks good. Overall, maybe a bit more trim around the edges, but he looks like he didn’t get his asshole blasted in, which is a positive I think. Not sure how I feel about the blue uni though. I guess it’s the standard color, but I mean it’s O.J. I guess I just figured at least one person would’ve been stabbed good enough to dye that shit USC red, it is prison after all. But I guess Juice lost his edge and he’s now a PC pussy. Maybe I’m a bit too harsh with all this post-binge watching Prison Break, cause I’m ┬ánow reading he was in a “White Collar” prison where they play tennis and other boojee shit, but I digress.

NFL Pensions?

Who actually knew this was a thing? More to the point, why the fuck do NFL players need pensions? They’re voluntarily choosing to smash each other to bits for money and entertainment. Fucking hell they’re making more than my eventual entry-level salary (advertising). Meanwhile in my world (the real world), I found out today that Illinois state income tax (or something, I’m so pissed off I didn’t even fully read or comprehend the email) is being raised 32 MOTHER FUCKING %. This washed up football player/psycho-murderer dude is making just under $50k/year for what, to prevent his already in jail ass from suing you? I don’t even think that’s possible! Of all things you’ve fucked up on Goodell, this has got to be one of the dumbest. Even if you didn’t draw it up, just fucking get rid of it. These old guard NFL guys are so fucked up from CTE they wouldn’t know a pile of money from green construction paper. The players are at fault too. Respect the fucking game, don’t take money from it once you’re retired, you knew the risks, so nut up and deal with your shit. Moral of the story, fuck the system.

I really really really wish Juice actually dropped the “I’m not black, I’m O.J.” line from Hov’s “The Story of O.J.” or whatever. That sound byte would literally be the greatest ever, or if not ever, definitely up there with the “Playoffs?!” rant.

Juice was legit, and here’s a YouTube video to prove it as 95% of the people who are alive now and reading definitely weren’t around when he played.


P.S. People are bashing this guy for, as he put it, “trying to keep it (the mood) light” by wearing a Kansas City Chiefs tie. For one, why do people give a shit what kind of tie he wears? It’s not like he was like “Yeah fuck O.J. and the Bills, I’m going to wear my football team allegiance tie to the hearing today!”, no fucking way. The guys’ wearing a solid black shirt, which for the record is a great move in the sense that you can wear literally anything other than black with it (unless you’re a California hipster or Lonzo Ball) and also, because he’s on the bigger side, it hides any and all sweat, which is always important. I do question his having that tie in the first place. Don’t get me wrong, it’s awesome and we need more fans like him out there buying stupid shit like that, but I’ve never seen that worn anywhere.

P.P.S. What stiff, pencil-pushing, cubicle-sitting moron came up with the bright idea to call these people “commissioners”. Roger Goodell, Rob Manfred, and Adam Silver are “commissioners”. You, heavy Chiefs guy, are not. Makes zero fucking sense. 0.

Until tomorrow.

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