Daily Blog #15: Alexandre Lacazette signs for Arsenal F.C.

It’s Official

The End of the Struggle?

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I’ve been an Arsenal fan for as long as I can remember. For the life of me, the only thing I can remember is Arsene Wenger either 1. Not spending any fucking money or 2. Spending money on random guys you’ve never heard of like Rob Holding, Gabriel Paulista, Lucas Perez, Mathieu Debuchy, etc. etc. the list goes on forever.

Alexandre you Beauty

Right now, I’m of the mindset that Laca deserves the £52.7 record-breaking fee he garnered. He’s a true #9, he’s technically skilled, rapid as fuck, and he SCORES GOALS. His only flaw is that he plays in a shit league, but so what? He’s averaged 28 goals/season in all competitions over the past four seasons. Anyone who scores that much in any league is worth the money.

£52.7 million = BUCKETS of money, but it’s not like AFC doesn’t have it. Yes, I realize we spent £45 million on Xhaka and £41 million on Mustafa last summer, but when was the last time Arsenal actually paid for a player who was at the height of his career/on the brink? Mesut Ozil in 2014? Exactly. Arsenal spend money each summer, that’s not my criticism. For a club of their size, when’s the last time they balled out on multiple players who actually end up getting significant first team minutes? 2013? If you ever want to win anything other than the FA Cup, which is irrelevant now, that can’t happen.

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I’m still pissed off we didn’t make Champions League for the first time in over two decades and that those fuckers at Spurs finished ahead of us (thereby also qualifying for Champions League). As counterintuitive as it may sound, I’m glad. It finally got that stingy, penny-pinching kook we call a Manager to buy someone proven that actually fills a need in the squad. Side note: This picture is so blatantly fake, but I love it.

I get it’s Ligue 1, top-to-bottom one of the lesser leagues in the world, but Laca’s highlight tape at Lyon is un-fucking-believable. There’s probably another explanation for how they predicted the move (by the title) four months in advance, but I really don’t feel like ranting about it right now.

The best, and most exciting part of all this, which surprisingly is a flipped of Wenger spending a fraction of what’s been allotted to him, is that Arsenal’s ‘war chest’ for transfers is pretty much bottomless. I don’t give a shit who we buy, as long as they’re either 1. Proven in their respective league or 2. An exciting young talent with potential. I swear to God if Wenger just sits back on his laurels after this deal and doesn’t buy anyone else, I’ll burn a kit.

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I’ll also address this now as I’m near-positive I’ll get called out for this as a stubborn Arsenal fan. I’m not ashamed to admit, I AM THIS MEME. Being completely honest, there’s a near 100% chance it happens again this season. Will I support my team and deny that until I die? Fucking right I will.

Next great Arsenal Frenchman? His Ligue 1 goalscoring record and unreal highlight tape sure hint at it. The 2018 season can’t come quick enough.

Oh and P.S. fuck you Tottenham Hotspur. Still the best chant in London.

Until tomorrow.

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