Daily Blog #4: Basketball Jerseys

Anyone that knows me knows that I LOVE jerseys; the more colorful, dated, and random the better. With websites like AliExpress and DHgate coming more and more into the mainstream, my brain has been conditioned to think that spending any more than $25 is utter blasphemy. I’ve also began to frequent many a thrift in my conquest. Although I’m sure I forgot some classics, below are my top 10 NBA jerseys of all time (as well as some honorable mentions).

The Picks

Honorable Mentions:

Orlando Magic 1994-1998 Roads

Fuck Shaqs’ cocky douchebag ass. Pinstripes on jerseys are ALWAYS fire: 90s Pacers, 90s Bulls, 90s Magic… hmm I’m starting to see a trend here. They really don’t make jerseys like this anymore: the ‘O’ replaced star, the cartoon-like numbers, and the white/blue/black stripes depending on the arena… its just a shame Shaq left Penny and Nicky Anderson to fend for themselves in ’96.

Charlotte Hornets 1989-1996 Roads

If you can’t understand and appreciate the hilarity behind Muggsy Bogues (5’3″) actually starting a game standing with guys who are all over a foot taller than him next tallest 6’4″. Bogues, Johnson, Curry. What a three.

 

The Top 10

10. Detroit Pistons 1997-2001 Roads

Long live the ‘teal era’. Why these jerseys were only worn for 4 years is beyond me. Rick Mahorn, Joe Dumars, Grant Hill, some of the grittiest Pistons of all time. The teal, along with the 90s horse and exhaust pipe, make this jersey one that won’t ever be replicated. Also, RIP Grant Hill’s ankle.

9. Indiana Pacers 1991-1997 Roads

I fucking hate the current Pacers. But oh the stories these jerseys could tell… Reggie Miller’s infamous choke game. Reggie Miller’s 8 points in 9 seconds game. Seven years of Reggie Miller trash talk.

8. Seattle Supersonics 1996-2001 Alternates

Seattle needs a team ASAP. I respect the shit out of Gary Payton mostly for his defense, but also because he never shut the hell up chirping people on the court. The classic 90s Space Needle-centered logos along with the green-yellow, green-yellow-red combos make this one of a kind. RIP Seattle SuperSonics.

7. Philadelphia 76ers 1997-2009 Roads

Aside from Allen Iverson, Dikembe Mutombo, Andre Igoudala, and Chris Weber, everyone else who wore this jersey was absolute garbage. That having been said, there’s just something about it that I’ll always love. Honestly, it’s probably Ty Lue with his awful rows getting his ankles destroyed and getting literally stepped over.

6. Atlanta Hawks 1982-1992 Roads

These jerseys kinda look like they were made in a McDonalds factory, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing, everyone loves McDons. To me, anything from the Hawks Pac-Man era is fire. With players like Spud Webb and Dominique Wilkins, all you’d see is a blur of red to know you were fucked.

5. Memphis (Vancouver) Grizzles 1995-2000 Roads

These jerseys are so weird, and yet, so perfect-looking. I have no idea what the fuck is on the collar, the arm holes, or around the waist, but that design, coupled with block letters that are the epitome of the 90s, an oversized cartoon grizzly bear, is a work of art on a teal canvas.

4. Phoenix Suns 1992-2000 Roads

Somehow the Barkley + Johnson combo made it to the finals with these colorful monstrosities. It’s also crazy to think that two of the best point guards ever, Jason Kidd and Steve Nash, both played at the same time in one of the best jerseys of all time. That having been said, I don’t get what the fuck this even is. A flying sun basketball? Like it’s cool and all but what does that even have to do with anything.

3. Denver Nuggets 1985-1993 Roads

Aside from Dikembe Mutombo and Alex English, I couldn’t tell you the name of anybody on these teams. Really though, that doesn’t matter. Normally I wouldn’t like the concept of a super colorful rainbow jersey, but whenever they bring these skyline jerseys back, in literally any form (new or old color-ways) the NBA is instantly a much better place.

2. Toronto Raptors 1995-1999 Homes

I know I’ll get flack for this, but I actually like the home whites more than the classic (frat) away purples. Either way, this design is legendary. Couldn’t tell ya any of the players on those teams aside from TMac and VC but I know all they basically did was dunk. If you really think about the overall concept, a cartoon dinosaur dribbling a basketball, the jerseys look dumb as fuck, but its Canada, so really everything is laughable. Sorrey!

1. Utah Jazz 1996-2004 Roads

In my mind, there’s no debate. John Stockton’s short shorts + mountain jerseys = hands down the greatest jersey combo EVER. Sure, more people wear the purple VC/TMac 90s Raptors jerseys, but in terms of design + team greatness, nothing compares to the Jazz teams rocking these in both the ’97 and ’98 finals v. the ‘Jordan era’ Bulls. I also like how they made it easy on stupid people like me. Utah = Mountains & Mormons.

Until tomorrow.

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